BEHOLD: "Queen Sports Bloodshot Eye At Polo Match"

Hilarity ensues as reptilian pain harvester Mrs Windsor loses a contact lens and reveals her great big black lizard eyehole for the umpteenth time in this unprecedented pain harvesting festival.

Reports Yahoo:

"Buckingham Palace has declined to say how the Queen came to suffer an extremely bloodshot eye. Her red left eye is clearly visible in photographs taken as she watched polo players take to the field at the Cartier Queen's Cup Final in Surrey.

A Buckingham Palace spokesman would say only that "nothing untoward" had happened and the monarch was in "fine fettle".