idea

Fear And Loathing In Dubai

Awesome photo by Charlotte Whewell

Hey you guuuuuys!

So, you know how I've been moaning for ages about how crap my keyboard and mouse are, and how clicking the left mouse button requires the strength of ten men and using the thing all day every day is crippling me, and how my keyboard is so loud it gives my long suffering but resiliently hot female companion migraines, and how getting it to communicate with you every day requires such force it sends shockwaves through my whole skeleton that reverberate for the following 8 hours at LEAST and give me crazy nightmares? Yeah?

Well.

I totally bought myself a new keyboard and mouse!

BOOYA!

Know what else?

They are wireless!

BLAMMO! IN YOUR FACE CRAPPY OLD KEYBOARD AND MOUSE! IN THE BIN WITH YOU! YOU ARE REPLACED! AHAHAHAHAHA! FIE!

Rah though. While typing on this new thing is a comparative JOY, I am a little confused as to why something that is WIRELESS is so prohibitively HEAVY - the keyboard is like a slab of GRANITE, and I practically have to DRAG the nouse around my DESK. It is RIDICULOUS, but it is an improvement regardless. So, yes.

WOO HOO!

Rah though. It is announcement time.

WE HAVE A WINNER! A WINNER OF OUR FUCK YEAH DE BURGH COMPETITION!

ARE YOU READY?

AAAARE YOUUUU REEEEADY?

POW!

Clear cut, in our judges' opinion, was that victory. Congratulations Johnny! Not only was your winning entry REALLY FUNNY, it has also set in a motion a whole goddamn MOVIE in our minds, sort of like James Bond meets Lost Highway, in which the valiant de Burgh has his life stolen from him by an evil clone, who commits a series of increasingly terrible atrocities in his good name. Anyone got the number for Hollywood? IT IS A SMASH I TELL YOU! Obviously, Johnny, you forgo all rights to any ownership of what is now MY awesome idea by accepting your awesome prize.

Here is your awesome prize, which will be winging it's way to you just as soon as you email me your address:

Congratulations then, Johnny. I think you'll find that much greater reward than the BEEELIONS of dollars I am going to make flogging your amazing idea to those idiots in Hollywood. BWA HA HA HA HA!

Ahem.

Ew.

That was weird.

I don't know what came over me there brothers and sisters. For a moment back there, I believe I must have been POSSESSED by the evil spirit of De Burgh's Dastardly Double! Crap! What have I done? Gentle reader! Save yourself before it is too late! DON'T LOOK INTO HIS EYES!

Yes. Now, let's hammer out this story together, and share in the spoils and the glory. THE GLOOOOOOOOOOORY! So, we have Good de Burgh, who is a lovely man, then his EVIL TWIN SHOWS UP, and, let's say, shoots him with a  ray gun and locks him in a cage in a dirty basement wearing nothing but a nappy. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

The Akira The Don Guide To: Death’s Head

Sad but true.

Anyway.

I ADVISE YOU CLICK THAT THING TO READ IT ALL!

BIGGER IS BETTER!

ROB LIEFELD TAUGHT ME THAT!

HA!

Rah then. That was epic. This week I decided that doing a strip every day was taking too much of my time, so I figured I'd try one full page strip, instead of the three panel thing.  Well, the full page strip took a lot of time. Shock horror. Maybe I can get quicker at it. Anyway, I hope you like it, and that it wasn't a total waste of time. It was fun to do, anyway. PLUS, I Camstasia-ed the thing, so I can make a speed drawing video out of the thing.

So, what song should I use for the video? One of mine, obs. Answers in the comments. If I use one of your suggestions I'll send you my OG Death's Head sketch.

Indeed, it has been an arty week. I sold Happiness, which made me feel legitimate at drawing - pretty dumb whichever way you look at it, but still. Packaging that seven year old drawing in a stiff cardboard tube was emotional, for all manner of reasons I haven't the time to ponder. It was cleansing as well. On to the next. That period is done, and this one is happening, and it is awesome and fun and exciting. Learn, yes, build, yes, but if you catch me spending any serious amount of time looking back, belt me.

OK?

Cheers!

Anyway. I well enjoyed the Doncast this week, so I am looking forward to the next one. We'll be doing Our Tune again, so send in your stories and your songs - akirathedon at googlemail.com. ALSO! When we reach 300 live listeners, I am going to get my band in and do a gig for you. I have an exciting vision for how to do it which I am not going to elaborate on for fear of being ripped off before it happens. OK? So get ready. It's gonna be ace.

OK. Back to work. I am gonna speed up this footage. Tell me what song to use! My brain is mush!

PAX!

EDIT: Here's the video. Raydome won. WHOOOO!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11aVDdn8llM

Lush

So I fell alseep on the sofa after 5, and was awakened gently by Super Phil at 6:20, and it transpired Bird left my bag with my passport in it at the venue last night. But Bird's got me another ID card, so we're outside waiting for Jeff to pick us up at 6:30. And at midday we're in LA, and soon after that we're in Interscope's offices,and I'm filling a bag with Nirvana, Guns N Roses, Gilbert And Sullivan, Dre, Peter Gabriel, Police and other such back catalogue. Jimmy Iovine has a signed letter from Tupac and a video console that won't switch on. And loads of ideas. A balcony. A lush view. LA is lush to look at, from these places of advantage. Like, later we visit Jeff and Trent's, and there's this fucking alien cat that loves me, and an incredible, incredible view, of this desolate wilderness spattered with money.

It was a lovely day.

But in the nighttime it is hard not to see that LA is awash with cunts. It is a sad and massive amount of cunts, and I am not sure whether it is sad because this is what the world did to them, or because this is what they do to the world, or because they are cunts, and you can see their faces rotting right in front of your eyes.