The FHM Top 100 High Street Honeys 2006

I got this letter last night, that depressed me greatly. Forsooth: "hey akira,

Its Gina Bartlett here! im a zoology student at swansea uni and i came to see you at your cardiff gig and thought you were awesome,my friend will bought you a drink!especially liked the 'fuck pete doherty!' and your comment on the swansea locals was hilarious yes all the girls and guys do look the same ,its scary!pink wearing,mullet donning, metrosexual men!!!

However...I need to ask you a favour....

I am lucky enough to have got into the fhm top 100 high street honeys 2006 and have a month to get as many votes as possible to get into the top 10 to help me get enough money to get my way through vet school!so basically i would really appreciate it if you could put some of my pics on your site,or just one!explaining my cause to help me out!if you can only put one if you could put '68' on that would be awesome as it is in fhm this month.

To vote for me all the willing candidates need to do is put ther name plus gina bartlett number 93 on an email and send it to honeysvote@fhm.com and its all free

thanks hun,

as we say in swansea-your a legend!and keep up the awesome music!!!

love gina xx"

So, the niceness was of course not the depressing bit. The two most depressing bits were

"I am lucky enough to have got into the fhm top 100 high street honeys 2006"

And

"...get into the top 10 to help me get enough money to get my way through vet school"

Firstly, I can think of few worse fates for ladies in this ugly modern age than a place in that "top 100". As a pink thing pointed out last night, the outcome tends be horror-filled and dismal parties at China Whites or some other such scum hole, with rotten males in cheap suits bragging over lines of chop about how many of this list they've "done". If you win, you will be objectified, leered at, and laughed at, by scum. If you lose, you will be objectified, leered at, and laughed at, by scum.

Either way, they will do their best to make you feel ugly. When you are in fact a happy beautiful human person who needs not such rottery to realise that.

It is a no win situation.

And the other bit? Did a "Labour" government REALLY scrap student grants, forcing our aspirant young women into prostitution, and its numerous, tabloid-approved offshoots?

Is the post feminist landscape really a place in which women must be everything they once were, AND do the same jobs as men for less money AND be public objects for the gratification of hairy palmed pusscapsules?

Is Paris Hilton really the ultimate Western female role model? Is it really Burqa or Bugger All? Is there no in between anymore?

Gina, I wish you all the luck, and love, in the world. But, truly, I don't think this particular enterprise is going to bring you any of that.