OH YEAH! Hai gang! So, I am totally writing to you from the cosy confines of a coffee spot in central London, and I feel totally futuristic and nothing at all like a dick head. Saying that, the connection is pretty slow, so slow in fact I couldn't get that video I just linked to playing, which is a shame as love it very much, so we have a little way to go yet before I am doing fucking carwheels and braying to the heavens about the glories of Remote Working.
Still, it is pritty, pritty cool (as is the news that the new season of Curb starts this July. YES!).
I am also writing to you with a rubbery face, as I just survived a barbaric ordeal at the dentist's. I swapped to a classier joint after the evil demon-headmaster looking ass mofo in Hommerton let a sneaky, squeaky fart go RIGHT NEXT TO MY Be-DRUGG-ED HEAD, and this place is at least sanitary, but my new dentist is far too young and is playing at doctors and nurses with his assistant. Well I suppose he is kind-of-a-doctor and she kind-of-a-nurse, but is besides the point, it feels like being on the set of a daytime soap opera in the seventies and I am not fully confortable with it frankly. Also the dentist's X-Ray equipment is seemingly on the blink as it failed to spot the cavernous extent of the hole that has grown in my tooth, meaning the dentist was fully unprepared for what awaited him and made lots of decisions on the fly, and those decisions lead to a seemingly never-ending arms race of daggers and lances and spears and othersuch metal diggy things which was somwaht disconcering, even if I AM a fucking rock solid hardman He-Man figure and don't sweat the small shit like being drugged and strapped to a chair with some fucking child attaching my face with an ever escapalting array of stone aged weaponry.
Oh, and they only had ONE MAGAZINE, which was some rubbishly football magazine, and was, queerly, plonked on its own next to a box of tissues, thusly:
That photo lead to all manner of speculation as to the actual nature of the so-called "dentists" on twitter, where it was unanimously decreed that I was in fact there to donate sperm (pronounced "sper-um"), which I most definitely was not, thank you very much.
ANYWAY! Have you been on Youtube today? I am sure you have, because you'd have been watching my new video and passing it on to all your friends and family because you're so grayte and awesome. So you totally saw that their new logo, debuted on their site this morning is a total rip off of MY new logo, debuted on this site last week, right?
SHOCKING. I should probably sue. Then I could use all the missions of moneys I got off Google to actually build rings around the earth, on which you and me and all our palsies could swoosh about on hovering jetski things, like proper future people. Hey, there's an idea. I need to do a new You inspired Dondoodle anyway. Tell me what awesome futurtisting thing YOU'd create if you got millions of moneys from suing google, leave them in the comments, and I'll pick one and draw it. GO GO GO!