I Got 99 Acapellas And I Don't Say Bitch In One. I Think.

I've had lots of people asking me for acapellas lately, so I have had a little splurge and uploaded a bunch. I haven't found anywhere official to house them on the site yet, so here will have to do. I am going to add some more over the next few days - and find somewhere official for them to live - so let me know in the comments or via The Channels what songs you'd like acapellas for.

DOWNLOAD: Akira The Don - Fist of The North Star ft Littles Acapella DOWNLOAD: Akira The Don - We Won't Be Broke Forever Baby ft Gruff Rhys Acapella DOWNLOAD: Akira The Don - I Am not Dead YEAH Acapella 105 DOWNLOAD: Akira The Don - Nothing Lasts Forever ft Envy Acapella 105 DOWNLOAD: Akira The Don - Video Highway Acapella DOWNLOAD: Akira The Don - We Are Not Alone Acapella 125


So, yesterday DC's new toilet-lid logo had me choking up my casserole, and today it's Jay-Z, who has reportedly written (or most likely dictated, since he hates pens) a wovewy ickle poemy weomey about how he's not going to say mean things about ladies anymore since he's just spawned one. It goes a little something like this:

"Before I got in the game, made a change, and got rich/I didn’t think hard about using the word bitch/I rapped, I flipped it, I sold it, I lived it/Now with my daughter in this world I curse those that give it/I never realized while on the fast track that I'd give riddance to the word bitch/To leave her innocence intact/No man will degrade her, or call her name/Forever young you may pass/Blue Ivy Carter, my angel."

If true, this is a level of fuckery hitherto unimaginable in rap. Is Sean Carter really saying that, despite having enjoyed the company and the love of a mother and a beautiful wife, it didn't occur to him that disrespecting females might be the opposite of the righteous path until he actually sired one of his own? That it was not until he saw those big brown eyes peering back into his, those little camel nostrils flexing in rhythm with his own, as if looking into some sort of magic mirror, that he though, "sheeeee-it, this is one of those Bitch things I've been hating on and mocking in my excellent and clever raps all these years? But it's so much like me! How coud I possibly disrespect something so much like me? I must stop at once! Especially as I don't really need to call anyone a bitch anymore so as to appear hard and street, since I am a legitimate business man these days and I hang out with Donald Trump and Bono who neither expect nor require me to call anybody a bitch. Or a ho. Amen."

The credibility of the source is suspect, however, as the source is the NME, who have not been shy about making things up in the past (word to Morrissey). If false, Jay-Z will have to sue, else open himself up for a future plagued with god-awful poetry accredited to his name spattering the internet like flecks of baby sick. "No your honour," he will say, "I do not intend on ceasing my use of the word bitch at all, despite having fathered female young. It is a goodly word and perfectly suits my descriptive purposes. As I said on my song with Kanye West, 'That's My Bitch', a bitch is a dog and a dog is an animal and an animal is nature and nature is beautiful so actually it's a compliment. Neither will I cease to refer to young ladies as hoes, your honour, for hoes are real, and it would be remiss of me to pretend otherwise."

EDIT: The poem was indeed bogus, as confirmed by this Tweet from The Roots' Questlove:

What a funny old world it is. Thank goodness for Lil B. We're this close to a rap Glad To Be Gay at this point, and it couldn't have come a moment sooner.



Speaking of which, the author of that mighty anthem, one of my childhood heroes, Tom Robinson, give Video Highway the thumbs up this morning:


Thank you Tom! You are a legend and I am truly honoured!

I was on Tom's show a few years back. I did a live version of Thanks for All The AIDS with Joey Driscol doing beatbox. I wonder if it's out there on the internets anywhere. A shiny ATD T-shirt to the brave soul that can find it for me! Go!

Right, I must dash, I have a video script to finalise. We Won't Be broke Forever, the third and final act in the Life Equation Trilogy is coming on february 6th!

I will leave you with this beautiful little story, from my Facebook page.