andrew wk

Bare Necessities 3

I got Manga Studio back! I got Photoshop back! So the comic is back! Whooo!


I should probably combine all these Bare Necessities posts, eh?

By the way, I have been listening to Mother Of Mankind on headphones while I've been drawing this, cos my dear Mother is asleep in the next room, and it is flipping INCREDIBLE.


That's from a song called I Will Find God.

So, so, SO inspirational. If it wasn't three in the morning, and if my Mother wasn't asleep in  the next room, I'd throw the window open and shout at the sky.

Rah then!

Tomorrow, around lunchtime, be here... for SECURITY.

ADVENT 10: Koltreg - I Don't Hate The Beatles Anymore

akirabeatlescopy2 DOWNLOAD: Kotreg - I Don't Hate The Beatles Anymore

Our transatlantic friend Koltreg, AKA Luke Herr explains:

I Don't Hate The Beatles Anymore has been recorded as part of a school sound editing project to learn the very basics of applying effects and mixing tracks in ProTools. The idea was to record a monologue that held some personal value to the person recording it and as a resident denizen of the Internet, I Don't Hate The Beatles Anymore has some good lessons on giving everything a chance or at least ignoring it instead of trashing it. The Reading was done by Rico M. (, Produced and Mixed by Luke "Koltreg" H (, with Illustrations by Blazel (

School sound editing project? You kids these days don't know how good you've got it! When I was at school all we had was recorders and some bust up violins. Pah!

For really though, excellent work gents. It sounds great, and the picture is awesome. Win!

In the spirit of giving, here's the OG, from this year's The Omega Sanction.

Akira The Don - I Don't Hate The Beatles Anymore

Produced by Akira The Don. Backing vocals by Martin Carr and Mary Wytcherly. Guitar and synths by Jeremy Allen. Keyboards by Ginge. Prgramming and sytnths by AK Donovan.

World Turned Upside Down

destroyed The internet's crazy. Today I got sent an album purported to be by the fabled Steev Mike from '92 (with pretty sexy graphic design), and Andrew W.K.'s 2000 demo tape, which sounds like Sham 69. Apart from the bits that sound like pure Andrew W.K. It's comprised of a bunch of songs from both I Get Wet and The Wolf, which shows how well planned the whole thing was. Actually, didn't Kanye West do something like that as well? Good thinking, really. Lots of people spend their whole lives writing that first album, put all their best songs on it, then bang their heads against the wall making the second one.

No, that's not what I have been doing. My second album is a work of Unparalleled Awesome. I have had money and personnel issues. To which one could react in one of two ways.

Way 1:


Way 2:


Actually, there are many other ways. But you know how I get down. That's right. I veer between the two like the ball from Pong.

Hey, you wanna hear something really crazy off of the 20o0 AD Andrew W.K. demo?

OK. Here you go. This sounds like Those Evil Movies From The Late Seventies and/or early Oasis and is called Kill Yourself. It's pretty much the opposite of what he's saying these days, and begs a number of questions. Feel free to ask them.

STREAM: Andrew W.K. - Kill Yourself


So, anyway. I can't make this, as I shall be visiting my Mother, but if you're in London tonight, The Open Rights Group are having a debate about this whole Vee Steel Yourn Internets! thing Peter Mandelson and The FAC and all those other Turncoats are espousing. From

Peter Mandelson thinks disconnecting filesharers will help the music and film industries. He's plain wrong. This extreme option would trample on the rights of internet users - and the rights of their families - without earning a penny for musicians and film-makers.

Two internationally-renowned and exciting speakers will ask: if the government can get things this badly wrong, then why, and what should we really be doing?

Amen. One of the speakers is Gerd Leonhard, who is a wise man. So go, if you can, and let me know how it went. And in the meanwhile, here's Billy Bragg singing about The Sin of Property. Ha!

STREAM: Billy Bragg - The World Turned Upside Down

London, Mi-lan, Paris, New Yich, or How I Managed To Judge The Gonzales VS Andrew Wk Piano Battle

plane2 So, yeah. Like I said. I AM BACK.

Which is more of an achievement than one might imagine. That I got to New York at all is pretty amazing. You already knew I'd been through a week of foul adversity before I left. Who knew there was more to come? Who knew that getting Akira The Don out to New York to judge an Awesome Piano Battle between Chilly Gonzales and Andrew W.K. was going to be such a fucking epic struggle?

Perhaps I should have. That Ignorant Old Testament Skygod was testing me, brothers and sisters, that was clear from the start. And so it was to continue. If there was a thing to go wrong on that outward journey, then it would. While my acting debut was a success of Olympian proportions, what was to follow was like something from John Cleese's Clockwork.

First off my flight from London to Milan was delayed. Not too much, but enough to get me antsy. Enough to tighten the stomach and shorted the fingernails. I knew Milan was trouble when we arrived and I tripped over my shoelace and hit myself in the back of the head with my brown leather sports bag. And when security wouldn't let me through the gate and told me to go upstairs to check in, a cold sweat crept across my forehead and prickled my palms. I tore through that rotten place - yellowed, musty, and foul of carpet, like an airport from The Seventies - but when I got to check in, it was empty, and nobody knew any English, or at least pretended they didn't. I dashed around the airport in what could only be described truthfully as "a tizzy", eventually finding the ticket office for the company behind my precious flight to New York.

The woman behind the counter, who looked like she had just stepped out of a seventies holiday camp, and eyed me with a languid, suspicious derision, took twenty five (25) minutes to come to the conclusion that I would not be allowed onto my flight (which departed for New York City but fifteen minutes after that swineheaded decision) as the security "should" have let me through downstairs, and I "should" never have set foot in the main terminal.

"But... but... but it's not my FAULT!" I wailed, deep from the glacial insides of my tragic World Of Anguish. Seventies Lady didn't care. I wasn't getting on that flight. And her shoddy-ass airline wasn't flying again until tomorrow.

"But... but... but I need to be in New York city by 11! Tomorrow Andrew W.K. and Chilly Gonzales won't be battling anymore!" I cried, nay, warbled, desperately. "It'll be too late! This isn't fair! It's your airport's fault! You must sort this out!"

She eyed me coldly, like that dinosaur in Jurassic Park eyeballed the fat guy from Sinefeld before it grew giant bat ears and sprayed him with black acid. Then she sighed, and explained: No they would Not be putting me on a rival's airplane, under any circumstances. Anyway, she said, there were only two other airlines flying to NY from Milan that afternoon, and the "cheapest" was going to cost £780.


A great white rage filled my brain. Then I headbutted her desk.

Seventies lady shrugged her shoulders, and wandered off out back.

Another fucking ticket. ANOTHER FUCKING PLANE TICKET! That would be the fifth one now. 5th. 5. Five. FIVE FUCKING PLANE TICKETS and I couldn't afford my fucking RENT oh dear shitting Christ what the FUCK! WHY ME, what did I EVER DO, apart from that one thing but that could have happened to ANYONE right? Well OK there was that other thing but I was ONLY SIXTEEN GIVE ME A BREAK I wasn't THINKING STRAIGHT was I oh WAH WAH WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

I paced around in a frenzy for some time, before deciding to do what any other mildly-sane late twenties male would do in such a situation - I  called my girlfriend, and said, "WAH! WAH! Wah-wah WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Then my money ran out.

Then I begged an Italian lady who could hardly understand me to change my fiver into some euro coins, and she laughed at me. I didn't realise how totally worthless the pound had become of late. So, I ran, with all the grace of a crippled pelican, to...

Oh, bugger it. That's enough. To cut a long ass story a bit shorter my Mother ended up lending me the money to get another flight to NY. It was actually closer to £500 than £800 in the end, but still. I banished all thoughts of rent and bills and insolvency and exhaled a sigh of relief so huge and pointed it might have taken someone's eye out, had they been in the way.

So, me and the great big lump on my head flew to New York, via Paris, whose airport looked like something out of a glamorous near future, and didn't have a single fast food joint in it - just an uber-posh restaurant section, which I resented as I could not afford to eat in it. They also had a relatively luxurious-looking smoking bar, which I also resented, as I No Longer Smoke. Oh, and the swine stoke my deodorant! Foolishness on their part, given the stress levels I was under. I'd already changed my top twice.I was wringing wet when I left Milan, and a sodden dishrag by the time I got out of Paris.

Still. I got to JFK airport at 9:30, and got to the front of the que of America's scary-as-ever security pretty quickly. Last time I came, the latest addition to their arsenal was an eyeball scanner. They now have a bleeping, flashing green digital fingerprint machine that scared the utter crap out of me, for reasons some of you may understand, and the rest of you will have to guess at. But the bleeping stayed civil, and they let me through. Only for me to go and outdo my self by getting into what the New Yorkers call a "gypsy cab", which took over an an hour and a half to make the half an hour journey to Joe's Pub in Manhattan. It was gone eleven when we arrived, and when the incompetent, George Michael-bearded, Keanou-In-The-Matrix-Sunglasses-wearing, stop-and-take-a-piss-up-a-firehydrant-when-he-knew-damn-well-I-was-in-a-rush, piss-taking asshole fake-cabbie said, with a straight face, "that'll be $97 plus tip," it was all I could do to stop myself from tearing his smug face off with my bare hands and strangling him with it. As it was, I threw $40 at him and said, "$97?! Don't you dare take the piss out of me my brother! I have been here before! I am not a fucking mug! This is all you're getting and more than you deserve!" Then I slammed the door and legged it into the venue, heart beating out of my fucking sweat-sodden T shirt.

Ba-dum. Ba-dum.

A jovial bouncer greeted me.

"The Gonzales show? Sorry man, you missed it."

I gawped at him.

"A ha ha ha! Only joking man! Come on through!"

Seven and a half minutes later I was sat in a nice, yellow-lit backstage room with Gonzales and Andrew W.K., drinking a cold Guiness out of a flute-glass, smoking a cigarette (which I don't do anymore) and discussing score-taking etiquette.Everything was OK now. We were going to have fun.

That's all for now kids! Check back tomorrow to find out what happened next!

Adam As Actist, And A Tale Of Woe

AAA Nice Trainspotty poster, huh? That up there is the thing wot I have been learning lines for. It is a very funny TV pilot about the horrors of the Real Life Music Industry, called Access All Areas. It is wonderfully observed - I recognise every character in it. I now know all my lines, but shall likely fudge at least one, as apparenty Mercury is doing something weird and making the lives of people who's birthdays lie on the fifteenth, sixteenth, and seventeenth very difficult.

Take this New York trip. So, I did something wonderful for the galaxy, and set up a piano battle between Chilly "Fuckeye" Gonzales and Andrew "Don't Call Me Andy" W.K.. I wished that I could go, but I didn't even have enough money to pay my rent, so I had no idea how it could happen. Then Gonzales sent me an email:

I'm getting you a flight. I woke up this morning like "Akira must be there:.

I was right. You have to be there.

And oh, I did leap for joy! Oh, how happy was I! How grateful! How excited! And in my excitement, I didn't notice when the outbound flight was booked for Thursday afternoon that I already had a commitment  - indeed, the above pilot, no less - on Thursday evening.

Oh, how sick did I feel when I realised that (on Sunday afternoon, just as we wrapped filming the iANDY Zombie Film, natch). The bottom fell out of my belly. For Air Kenya (YES!) would not, and could not rearrange the flights. What was I to do?

I gnashed my teeth, I punched my door, and I searched my heart.

Then I phoned my bank, and begged for a loan.

Yeah! I know!

And they gave me one!

Which was lucky, as I also needed a new passport, since mine had been in the washing machine (and I remembered Music Like Dirt's tale of woe from SXSW), and do you know how much it costs to get a passport these days? £130. Yeah!

So I bought a new passport, and another flight to New York.

I was excited again.

Then, yesterday, I was hit with another of The Great Skygod's custard pies.

I discovered (thanks to the wisdom of my great friend BJ) that, as I won't be on the original outbound Thursday flight, I will not be allowed on the return flight.

Serious! They do that!

Oh, I was outraged on the phone. Oh, I pleaded.

"No exceptions."

Something inside, so strong, nearly died.

I had two options - let down all the lovely people involved in AAA, or buy a new flight, and flirt with eviction.

What did the man say?

Never Let Down.

So I bought another flight, back to the UK.


I am hilarious.

I am inept.

And I am in a Great Debt.

But I am going to New York.

I will be there from Friday to Sunday.

IT'S GONNA BE SO WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Oh, and if anyone wants to book me for something while I'm out there, get in touch.


Gonzales Challenges Andrew WK To A Piano Battle

POW Hi, my name is Akira The Don, and I bring people together.

From The Quietus:

Let the (piano) dual begin!

Guiness World Record Holding, Grammy nominated, tritesticular funk phenomenon Chilly "Fuckeye" Gonzales has challenged fellow solo piano elpeeist and avant garde long hair Andrew WK to a piano battle in New York next week, The Quietus can exclusively reveal.

Friend of the site and veritable polymath Akira The Don explains:

"This past Monday [September 14th] I was to head down to King's College to have one of my world famous filmed-sit-downs with Mr Andrew WK. When Chilly Gonzales got wind of this he recorded a masterful video message, challenging Andrew - a fellow solo-piano elpeeist - to a Mighty Dual in New York next week, and sent it to me. That afternoon, I played Andrew the message, and... well, you can see for yourselves."

The Quietus is overjoyed to confirm that Andrew has accepted Gonzales' challenge which will take part in Joe's Pub, NYC, Spetember 25. Watch this space for more details.

The full interview, in which Akira and Andrew discuss 55 Cadillac, giant robots, steam theory, and the mysterious and evil forces conspiring to stop the long-haired rocker from releasing records will be on The Quetus next week.

All I'm saying is someone needs to get me a ticket to this moment of HISTORY! Damn!

Music That Makes Sense

gundam1 I really need to start doing letters pages again. I get the best emails, I really do. Take, for instance, this one, that popped into my box at 00:16 today:

I really did bite my teachers. I spent 6+ years in mental hospitals as a kid, and thanks cause your music makes the most sense to me. SSTEENIS

Blaow. Awesome. Thanks Ssteenis, wherever you are. It's good to be useful.

Speaking of which, I finished ATD18 on Friday afternoon. Then I had to rush off to Gogledd Cymru, and I dind't have time to make a sleeve, error-check, or upload the thing before I went. I got back late last night, full of The Tire, and I don't think I'll have time today either, as I have a big meeting about my record, AND I'm off to meet...

Andrew WK!

Indeed. 55 Cadillac is out right now, and guess what just came out in Japan? That's right. Gundam Rock. Hot crap, it is fucking batshit awesome. Wanna hear a track?

Oh, alright then.

STREAM: Andrew WK - Encounter


If anyone has anything they'd like me to ask Mister Wilkes-Krier, please leave it in the comments.

Yes. And look out for that ATD18. It kicks balls.

Andrew WK - 55 Cadillac: Mini Review & Preview

55Cadillac As you may now, Andrew WK is about to release his 5th album, 55 Cadillac.

Which is a solo piano album.

Just like Gonzales, another great inspiration of mine, who's fifth album was, indeed, a solo piano album!

There is a difference though. Andrew's album is mostly comprised of "spontaneous piano improvisations, as well as the visualized manifestations of his car."

I don't think Gonz has a car.

Actually, he must. I just can't picture it. I'll ask him.

Anyway. I wonder if I can learn to play the piano well enough to have a solo piano album as my fifth.


So. Yeah. 55 Cadillac. It's grayte, baby. In turns stirring, epic, boisterous, creepy, gorgeous, Lynchian, Kubrikal, Goliath, it sings and it soars and it plummets and it crashes and it burns like a baby sun... close your eyes and you'll imagine you're climbing a thirty mile staircase to the summit of mount Olympus.


I don't intend to hit you off with the full gorgeousity - it is good to have something to look forward to, to get excited about. But here's just a little taste...

Have a listen to this.

STREAM: Andrew WK - Seeing The Car

Dope, huh? And that, bubba... that doesn't come close to the magic of The Whole.

So get your ass over here and preorder the thing. I suggest going for the vinyl. A mere £11.55k, bargain!

If You Want A Meellion Dollars, Just Think Really Hard...

55 Cadillac ...about a meellion dollars. OK? Just ask 50 Cent.

Take today. Wade and BJ came round to listen to the rough mixes of my new album, and help me suss out some preliminary track order. Both of them agree that the record is a thing of colossal awesomeness with at least 5 massive smash pop singles on it. After that BJ and I watched Grant Morrison on google video talking about a bunch of dope stuff, which is some of the same sort of dope stuff my second album is all about, like collective consciousness, and the deceptive idea of the individual and shit. (Late last year we reached out to Grant, FYI, but the last thing I heard was months ago). Anyway, we're watching this video, then BJ's has to run out to get the train back to his wife and baby boy, and I check my email, and I notice that while we were watching that footage of Grant Morrison talking about the sort of dope stuff my album's about...

Grant's wife had sent me and email.

I know, batshit, right? I told BJ, who was really freaked out. I told him he didn't need to be, cos that sort of crazy shit happens every day, but it stuck me that it's actually great that we still find this sort of thing awesome, even though it happens every day, because, well, it's awesome. Like the sun is awesome, and dewdrops on the morning grass are awesome.


A little later, Colin was showing me videos of Crispin Glover, who is some kind of genius. He reminded me of Andrew WK. I put on an Andrew WK record, and did the washing up, then I took a shower. In the shower I was wondering how I could go about getting Andrew WK to help me make my third album.

When I got out I logged onto Andrew There was a cool new picture of a beautiful shiny automobile on the front. I clicked it. You have to click through a bunch of of photos to get to the meat of Andrew's site. So i did.

The top story was about his new solo piano LP, 55 Cadillac. I thought, "dope", I wondered if Andrew WK had ever heard of Gonzales. Then my eyes drifted down a little, and I did a double take.

AWK Frontpage Like, wow, huh? Totally, totally wow.

If you look hard for the number 23, you think about it all day long, you see it everywhere.

You want a meellion dollars?

Hell, why not eh?

Lucky Mud

the-boxers-son Few things smell nicer than a lady, I can tell you that much.

It made me sad to leave her, so beautiful she is, smiling, sleeping - but I didn't want to wake her up with my noisy typing.

I type with the forefinger of each hand, in a very fast stabbing motion - clackaclackaclacka! I do a lot of things the wrong way, because I was never taught, or at least, I would never be taught, and insisted on finding my own way.

When I was 17, I was living above chip shop in Smethwick in a single room with no hot water or heating, and working in a record shop and a pub. It was a dream come true. I used to snog a sweet, beamish girl called Katie sometimes, when our gang went back to her house after a hard night dancing to indie records in Snobs (50p a shot and mixer). We cuddled on the sofa and smoked spliffs and watched Rumblefish. We were like children. One day she gave me a thin yellow paperback called Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas. The following afternoon, after I'd finished flogging marked-up radio-promos to 911 fans, I took myself up to the top if New Street, and sat on a statue of a lion, and read the whole thing.

Never before had I identified so thoroughly with another human.

I never took all those drugs I took between 1997 and 2003 because of Hunter S Thompson, but I did want to be just like him. I wrote a horrid little column for Playlouder for a few years, all about my adventures in london, with the booze and the acid and the cocaine and the vomiting on strangers. I behaved unconscionably, and tormented my friends for the sake of the "story." I used words like "swine", "pigfucker", and "rotten", because they were the sort of mean, ugly little words Hunter liked to "lash together", to get his point across. I must admit, it took me quite a while to realise that I wasn't actually all that much like Hunter Thompson at all.

I am a peculiarly cheery, optimistic person, if I am to be honest with myself. Where Hunter saw doom and despair, I see beauty, and potential. Sometime over Christmas, after I'd left Wales to visit My Mother's Side, in the Midlands, my beautiful girlfriend's similarly lovely sister observed that I seem to "love everybody", and I think that I must, for good or ill (another of Hunter's favourites, that last one). Even that zit-pocked wretch of a busdriver that told me to get off his "fucking bus" last night when I took too long to find my Oystercard. Even Carl Rove. Even Lonely Blair. Even John Power from Cast.

When I was 17 I made up a bunch of T-Shirts that had "John Power Is A Cunt" scrawled across the breast. I wandered around Selly Oak at 4 in the morning, kicking peoples walls down. I started fights I knew I couldn't win with mods and rockers, because I considered them to be culturally backwards, and against progress. I raged for a future I felt owed to me, and caused more harm than good.

All my hate is gone now. I have not one drop left. I have outrage, I have sadness, I have frustration, even a little regret. But no hate is left. One day, sometime after 2004, it rose up from deep within my ass, drifted away, and evaporated. Like a fart.

I love everyone that I meet, and I especially love the people who made it possible for me to breath this foul London air, whether they meant to or otherwise. I love my mother and my father, unconditionally. Two children who raised four incredible children, with very little money, and no formal training. What awesome magic is that?

I love my blood brothers - Zef, who made my website, Alex, who made smile, Marek, who made me check my fool self. I love my friends, and I love my girl. I love the pyjama bottoms she bought me for Christmas. They have "Crack!" and "Kazam!" printed all over them.

These days I see magic in raindrops, sometimes when I try hard, and sometimes by accident. I smile at old ladies on buses, and mean-faced children on trains. Yesterday I burst into tears 30 seconds into the first song on Andrew WK's new album, a boisterous and joyful collection of of Japanese pop songs. I didn't mean to, nor expect to, but I did, and I am glad. Soon I will be old, and then I will be dead, and even though there is still so much I long to accomplish, to see, to feel... even if every day from now until then is an orgy of horror and misfortune, even if I am battered to death tomorrow morning with a tire iron on my way to buy gas, I will feel like the luckiest boy that ever drew breath. All my boyhood dreams came true. I made music that was worth a damn to someone, I travelled to distant lands, I met amazing people, I fell in love, and was loved in return.

I was blessed.

Lucky me! Lucky mud!


p_11191 My mother just wrote to inform me that you spell Ola "Hola". I care not. Ola is my new word. So I say, OLA! To you!

Apparently Gmail thinks my mailing list is spam. So if you're on the list, you need to add to your list of addresses you mess with, or something. Else you'll never hear from me again. OH NO!

Just been listening to remixes. DAMN! YOU LOT KICK ASS!!!!!

So, I have a UK number you can call and leave me messages on. Anything you got for inclusion on the tape - shout outs, poetry, freestyling, screaming, laughter, karaoke, whatever you like.


You can hear my favourite song of the moment on the message.

That widget below also seems to work.

So! Send remixes to atd at Or the dropbox (password-  thedon)

Grab acapellas here. Still working on uploading instrumentals.

PS - TheMoffats129 ordered an MP3 bundle last week, which has been bouncing from the email address since. You out there? Did you get it? is there a better email i can send you download details to? SAAAAFE!

PPS - This is my favourite song today. It's a bonus track from the Korean import of Close Calls With Brick Walls. COP IT! IT'S AMAZING!

Download: Andrew WK - This Is My World

Akira The Don VS Andrew WK Round 1

akwk Keen eyed superpeople will have noticed its been Andrew WK Day over at the Blobblog. This is because Andrew has been in my thoughts this past week - he was in London, and I felt him. His three albums have been blasting out of my speakers, his mad eyed face has been haunting my dreams. I was never quite the same after meeting Andrew WK. Everything was different. If nothing else, he put the pointlessness of negative thought into focus for me. Alongside hearing Chilly Gonzales' rap album and my time with Crack Village, Andrew WK was instrumental in making me realise I could do this. Andrew WK is pure awesomeness. He is such a very strange, special, otherworldy creature. Sometimes I wonder if we aren't all dreaming him. Perhaps we are.

Anyway. More on that later. For now, let us cast our minds back to the winter of 2001, when I first met the White Killer, and my then-editor had the brainwave of titling the piece:

The Grand Old Puke Of (New) York

Andrew W.K. is the freshest, biggest, noisiest, and most overhyped thing to cross the pond in a very long time. And in a year that brought us The Strokes, The White Stripes, and Planet Of The Apes that is no mean feat. His debut single, the exhilarating 'Party Hard' went top twenty, and the album, 'I Get Wet' should be tearing up the nation's speakers right now. PlayLouder caught up with the human dynamo to talk about noise, dead babies and new frontiers...

According to various reports the W.K. in your name stands for White Killer. Is that true?

"Well, it's my name! My parents gave it to me! Your own name always seems like the dorkiest thing, and rock 'n' roll people all have these cool names, you do, but I spoke to my parents and they were like, 'that's the name we gave you, that's who you are, what have you got to hide?'. And they're right, of course. I'll say the same to my children."

Do you have children?

"Now is not the most important time to get into having children is it? Think about it... a BABY... it's a PERSON! The BIGGEST deal! Bigger than ANYTHING and you owe it, you owe it to give it everything, to be right. I'm gonna have kids, sure, loads of kids... I think I'll adopt though. There are so many kids out there with nothing, so many, and they deserve everything, you know? So I'll adopt a load of kids and maybe have one of my own."

A bouncing baby boy?

"Yeah. But I've been bouncing all over the place myself. Last week [Andrew W.K.'s debut UK show at the Garage] I bounced offstage, right into someone's head, then I bounced into the hospital, then I bounced out again. Actually, I did get really bouncy, like really... I am literally bouncing. You see, sometimes when I get excited, or just sometimes... I'll get a little shock, urgh! So I should get that checked. But hey, things could be a lot worse! There are people out there who can't even..."


"Yeah! See, I'm just doing the best I can right now. What we're doing here, all of us, we're discovering new frontiers... We have this responsibility to all those that can't. I'm really fired about these frontiers, this new horizon. We're working hard. Harder and harder. It is NOT acceptable to be down, ever, not when we are healthy and can do this. As long as I have food and a roof over my head I can never be down. Anything else, ANYTHING is just the icing on the cake. What I'm trying to do... what I'm doing, is being unconditionally OK. To be unconditionally OK is the real beauty. If you're unconditionally OK, you can never be hurt! You know, I was thinking about that in the bathroom just now. If you're unconditionally OK, you can never be offended by anything that anybody says. Say somebody says something about my family, says something about my mother... Perhaps I'd be upset, but if I'm unconditionally OK... see, I know my Mom wouldn't mind, because she is unconditionally OK! She strives, and we should all strive to be strong. These are new frontiers! Strength! No weakness! I mean, that's what I'm trying for myself. But you should just see it work! All of us... we work. Yeah, we work hard."

Were your parents encouraging about you getting into music?

"They inspire me, my parents, they really do. And my friends too. I've learnt everything from my friend Jimmy over these past two years, he's an incredible person..."

What else inspires you?

"You know, when I was in England, I read this terrible, terrible story, I'm sure you did too. There was this beautiful six year old girl, whose stepmother abused her and pretty much beat her to death and her father didn't do anything. I read that story, and all of a sudden everything became very clear, and every single thing that I have done since has been for her. But I'm motivated by the expenditure of energy, true beauty, the human ability to do so much good and so much bad... It moves me that I have all these advantages, hate moves me, jealousy moves me, love moves me... Yeah, I've been in love, heh heh. A few times, but that's what I'm on man, not making things conditional, doing what you want... jealousy, boundaries, that's not how it should be. I have trust, and I have faith."

Things must be pretty mental for you right now...

"You mean mentally? Fuck yeah, my brain... Oh, you mean like crazy? Yeah! Right now it's just such an exciting world! But it always has been. It's very intense, but the background of it all is comforting. I have my friends, my family, all these wonderful people... I'm lucky. But there were always things going on, and there always will be. If this finishes I won't finish... I will always rely on myself. And yeah, there's hype, but man, this is just the tip of the iceberg! You are in for a treat. Just you wait 'til the second album. The next album delivers on the promise that I have made! There is the potential to do anything, and it's gonna be amazing."

You ever heard of the Manic Street Preachers? They made a lot of promises in the early 90s that they never followed up...

"I've heard of them, sure. But you know what? I will fucking follow through for all the faggots who gave up! And for the shows, well, we're just gonna have the full on deal! Who knows, and what an exciting theory! This is OURS! We've got the whole world! Anyone who hears this, gets this, comes, it's all ours, theirs, everybody's! It's great, it's exciting and we've got the whole lifestyle! I believe in this, I truly, truly do, I want those that are believing too to know that it's there for YOU! It's yours! And I promise, I PROMISE that I will NEVER let you down. This is what we are doing. We have here is the ability to change their minds, give them freedom... The point is we're in something so vast, so, so vast."

You talk a lot about vastness and frontiers... do you believe in God?

"Yeah, I believe in God. A higher being, definitely. But the point is, God is in me, and he's in you... He's saying, you go! God is unconditional! Love! Unconditionally OK, heh! But not God in the traditional sense. Hell does not exist. Here, let me ask you something, see if you believe this... Where I come from, many people believe that if a person kills themselves they go straight to hell. That upsets me! Of course they don't go to hell. Those poor, sad, lonely people. They die, and someone takes their hand and says, 'Hey, it's OK, we're sorry... come with us, it's going to be OK'. Those fucking people... God's looking at them, shaking his head, going 'Oh man...' But the truth will out in the end."

Are there any bands around these days that you like, or respect?

"I respect everybody that's doing what they want to do, bands, people, in music, with optimism. All these people are trying to do is express themselves through what they're doing... even if they're only motivated by money, they're expressing themselves through money! But it's not my responsibility to judge them, so long as people are passionate that's great!"

What's your favourite childhood memory?

"That's a question! There are so many, I couldn't say one... it's not fair! But the first time ever heard really loud live music... I think it was at a classical concert with my father, and it was overwhelming - this impossibly big room, this immense sound, it just gave me butterflies, you know that feeling in your stomach? Like being on a rollercoaster. That, that's a glimpse into something vast, the feeling of being in contact with That... To be truly brave is to face that vastness, to look right into it."

What do you want from all this?

"To make music! I've made some giant leaps in music - how it affects me and all you have to do is to tap into more. Get stronger, get better, know more, learn more... But let the unknowns be just that - you should never want to know and understand everything, and you never will..."

Sex? Drugs?

"People should do whatever they want. Drugs are great for that, they let you into new things, new horizons... Oh YEAH I've done drugs, but it's down to the individual people. Some come out better, stronger, and some are destroyed, but I trust that people can make their own choices, bad or good in life. It's all good! Basically, I want people to know that to be unconditionally OK is the best thing. No matter what, you'll be OK. And I guarantee that whatever happens I will not go back on any of this. I will never let you down."

Adam Alphabet

The single 'Party Hard' and the album 'I Get Wet' are both out now on Mercury Records.

All Star ATD15

Sleeve by Akira The Don & Zef 2: Extra guitar by Jeremy Allen 6: Contains elements of Billy Ocean - Get Into My Car, David Hasselhoff - Jump In My Car & RZA ft. ODB - Black Widow Pt II 8: Daft Punk Da Funk & Dizzee Rascal - Sirens 9: Ft Dego Brown 12: Produced by Akira The Don 16: Recorded for XFM Scotland 17: Contains elements of Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine - After The Watershed & Lethal Bizzle - Police On My Back 19: Produced by Akira The Don 20: Produced by Ripperman 23: Contains elements of Cutting Crew - (I Just) Died In Your Arms & 4, 3, 2, 1 - LL Cool J ft Method Man, Redman & DMX 27: Produced by Akira The Don

Engineered Recorded and Mixed by Akira The Don at Don Studios III, Clapton.