Oh dear Lord, the sick black comedy of the US immigration mob! They’re deporting Cat Stevens today!

It is true. He was flying from London to Washington and his plane was diverted because he showed up on some terrorist watch list, becausehe’s Musim and, like, sang some songs about war being mean.

Apparently he is a threat to national security. It should be noted that Marillion were on the plane too, and I know who I’d be more worried about having over for dinner and peeing in my fishtank.

I woke up today with a bit of a hangover, but the voices of the children at play out my window soothed me into the world. The view from my window is very lovely - I see lots of school chiddlers at play in their playground, all in matching yellow jumpers. Sometimes they are not there, because it is not playtime, but usually it is.

So I felt a little bit pop starry today, actually - I was making a lovely song on my silly old computer, then a nice man from The Telegraph rang to ask me questions and chat about stuff, and then I checked my inbox and it was full of nice words and music ideas and offers of collaborations and free clothing. I haven’t had a poorly executed threat of violence in weeks.

Mixtape 4 is all but done, my people, and will be with you shortly….

I wanted to stay in yesterday, because I have started another mixtape, and I had ideas for that, but Soph rang and said there was a ticket for me to see Joanna Newsom, and she is amazing, so I got the bus with my pad, and filled a few pages of the pad with raps, and got to the venue and saw Joanna Newsom, and my skin all flushed and tingled and bristled. She is as awesome in the flesh as on record. The harp thing is incredible - one hand batters out premium gangsta basslines, and the other teases terrifying melody and slithers of beauty and sadness, while the girl herself exudes such joy one finds oneself expecting her to pop like a balloon at any second.

But she never, and I fled home straight away afterwards to make tunes, inspired so was I. After I made tunes I read my book in bed, which I have not done in a very long time, and it was very cosy indeed, I’ll have you know.

Today I have been very busy - I did 40 minutes of The Mixtape 4, which is mainly exclusives and mash ups and stuff - I have been playing with MOP and Vanilla and Carter and stuff, and rapping over The Furs, and remaking Dre joints with my boy HeTurnAll, who came over to freestyle with his boy.

So I’ll finish that tommorrow. Hoping for a contribution from The Dogg, but you know what he’s like…

This week I have fallen in love twice.

I made an amazing tune yesterday, all expanding plastic synth and live Glockenspiel by Soph. And the computer crashed. Bloody Fruity doesn’t autosave, bloody crappy old computer doesn’t have Soundfont plug in registered bloody Birddogg has my good computer hasn’t given it back moan moan moan.

A safe clart called Simon emailed me to alert me to the existence of these weird Republican dolls. There are a couple of Bush models, including a “Top Gun” one “in full flight suit,” that “comes complete with helmet and visor stenciled with George W. Bush, Goggles, Oxygen Tank and Face Mask.” Another Bush toy spits out clever slogans like “I was not elected to serve one party, but to serve our nation… I will not yield, I will not rest, I will not relent in waging the struggle for freedom and security for the American people… I come from Texas…” and, says the website, “many more.”

Wow. There is also a nice Rumsfeld one, that comes out with witty one liners like, “I belive what I said yesterday…”
“Oh, it was your rhetoric that made us do it…”
And the classic, “…standing around with your finger in your ear…”

Unfortunately there is not a Cheney doll that says “fuck”. They are missing out on a guaranteed earner there.

Oh well. This is all genuine official Republican shit, straight from the “Grand Old Party”. “What next?” asks a distraught Simon. “Tony Blair dolls?”

Well, incredibly, yes! The US based Hero Builders company has a whole selection of political action figures, although the Blair doll, launched in 2002, initially failed to sell.

“We love Blair in America,” said company spokersperson Victor Vicale, who came up with the idea to manifacture and sell political action figures the day after the September 11th attacks. “These guys saved the world that day,” he explained. “I thought, why give kids an action man when they could have real heroes to play with?”

But of course, a child needs baddies too, if playtime is to be complete, so the site offers an extensive “Villains” section, including “Crack Head Saddam” and “Dick American Taliban”. Oh, and there is a bloody and gruesome “Dual Headed Uday.” In addition, there’s a “Friend Or Foe” section that features a particularly lifelike “Conrad Putin”, and “Jacque Chirac”.

So, Dr David Barnett wrote a review of me and my peoples’ show. It is an excellent piece of writing, accompanied by some very scary photos.

Speaking of which, I spent a good portion of yesterday doing my first pro Akira The Don photoshoot for, which was for Arena magazine. There was little me, and an eight strong army of make up and stylist and photo and hair and stuff people. It was quite odd, and enjoyable, and I got dressed up in nice suits and zippy things and water, and it all ended up being quite porno. I also had beers and fell in love with my make up artiste. I am falling in love all over the place these days, the world is stuffed with joy.

Then last night me and my old Welsh mate Gwilym went to see the GLC soundsystem at Cargo, featuring Dwain Xain an fthe Maggot MC, which was a right proper knees up and no mistake. Free Form Five were quite dreadful though.

So.

Luke and I just got back from the old GLC building in Westminster, where Dame Dash and a lot of the Roc-A-Fella camp were having a press confrence. Nore was there! I met Nore! He’s with The Roc now, you see. Mr Dash was very nice as well, he is quite an amazing chap. Luke was very impressed by it all, and is now a Memphis Bleek fan. We left with bags of sweatbands and towels and mixtapes.

After Damon Dash, we had sausage and mash at S & M on the road next to Spittafields in East Londinium. It might have been the greatest sausage and mash I have ever tasted. We had venison and wild boar and cumberland and more besides. Now we feel alive again. “Come sad, leave happy”, said a sign on the wall. Next time I am sad I shall go there, and if you are sad I will take you.

Slash afternoon.

Wow. Last night was amazing! Thank you, you were a lovely audience. Birddogg was ninja, The Donnettes, genius Jeremy and magnificent Margo, were sublime, and I was quite good as well, even if I did manage to not have water and pour beer on my head, which failed to hydrate me and may have appeared more uncouth than, perhaps, it should have.

Anyway, lots of people were taking pictures, so maybe someone will send me some and I can stick them up here. The gig was recorded as well, so some audio should be with you shortly.

Right, I am off to have my picture taken.

That, dearest, is how the light gets in.

But you knew that. And you probably knew that I’m playing my first UK Show tonight, and that it is but my second in the world, but maybe you didn’t. So I will tell you again:

I play my first UK Show tonight!

Yes. With my Donnettes and the fabulous Birddogg. It is at the Islington Accademy, by Angel Tube, and we will be on at about half nine.

I am very much looking forward to it. We have had rehearsals, and they have been very fun and productive. Maybe there will be dances, hopefully perhaps.

I am rather obsessed with Leonard Cohen at the moment. I think ‘The Future’ might be the greatest apocalyptical song ever writ. One day, in the dim, distant future, I hope to be half as succinct as old Leonnard. Luke has his new album, and it made him cry. I is the sound of dying, he says.

I met Leonard’s lawyer, actually. He says he is not a very strict monk at all, and loves his evil Western luxuries very much.

It is customary to point you in the direction of something to read. I have read very little today, but I read this, and it was very good. It also summed up my feelings about The Towers Of London rather well, so there you go.

Anyway, I drank a little tequila last night, but I feel good today. I have a bed, and a huge bear guards the kitchen, where I have a neat little stack of noodles, 8 pence a pack from Tesco, some bread, and some peanut butter. My socks spin round and round in the big metal washing box, making a noise as hellish as any I have heard elsewhere. I have a computer set up. I have a four hour Leonard Cohen playlist. Yes, things seem distinctly rosy.

Oh wow! And oh no! I think I might not be around for this, but all my UK peeps around in November, Trevor Horn is playing a gig! With The Pet Shop Boys and ABC and Belle And Sebastian and tAtU and loads of other people he made sound amazing! But most excitingly, Buggles are playing! And it’s their first ever live show!

Man oh man. ‘Video Killed The Radio Star’ is the perfect pop song. ‘The Lexicon of Love’ the perfect pop album. I mean, ‘All The Things She Said’ was actual GENIUS. This could be the greatest thing ever.

One day I shall work with Trevor Horn, it will be earth shattering.

So I did that show with Moth, and it was very good fun actually, I freestyled for ages, la. It wasn’t very loud, but that meant people could hear most of what I was saying. Rory was there! Everybody loves Rory. He is the Prince Of The Geeks. One day he will be King.

I have to go back to London today, my contacts are there and this singular eyeball is causing me head pain.

Lucky then, that I’m scheduled to do a show with Mothboy. I had forgotten about this, somehow, but now I remeber. I am not sure if I’ve told you, but I’m on a track on Moth’s debut album, ‘The Fears’, which is out at the beginning of October on Ad Noiseam.

Anywa, here are the gig details:

Moonpalace

DJs : Dancon1 + Pete Stormcrow, Phil Summit and the return of Prophane!!!

Live set : Mothboy feat. Akira the Don

Guest DJs : Franck Stofer (sonore)

Guest DJ : Jim Backhaus / Magz Hall (Resonance104.4fm / Kosmische)

Guest DJ : Bubbletree

At: The Strong Rooms, 120-124 Curtain Road, London EC2 (nearest tube: Old Street)

6pm - midnight

Admission free

Prior to that, I shall be going to see Crack Village at 93 Feet East, which is pretty exciting. When I was in Crack Village, I always wanted to see Crack Village. Now I shall.

The animation is not quite finished, but the meat of it is.

Anyone who thinks that Tony Blair is not a power mad freak entirely in cahoots with the power mad freaks running things across the pond, check it out - months after the terrifying horror of touch screen voting made its way over here, less than a month after I stumbled across the existence of FEMA, my brother informs me we are getting our own.

Basically, FEMA’s whole thing rests on Vicious Dodgers being able to suspend the constitution at the drop of a hat, or a bottle, or a bomb, thus turning the US into an actual Police State, declaring Marshall Law, rounding up all the povs, etc. And Blair wants to do the same here, with The Civil Contingencies Bill, which looks likely to get passed in a fortnight unless we all make a huge noise. It basically enables New Labour to declare a State Of Emergency and suspend Parliament with even less reason than those FEMA freaks. Their definition of “emergency”, which is the trigger for these terrifying actions, “means an event or situation which threatens serious damage to property… disruption of a supply of money, food, water, energy or fuel… disruption of an electronic or other system of communication…”

Basically a fucking virus is good enough reason to put the country on lockdown. And, basically, turn an apathetic democracy into a dumb dictatorship. Whoopee!

Go read the thing, seriously, it is weird. Then email newspapers and tell your mates and ring your MP. I have started on the first two, but have no credit at the moment and my Mam’s not got outgoing calls on the landline.

In other news - Cheney has been telling poor terrified Americans that if they vote for John Kerry they will die.

Was the world always this dark? Did I only just start noticing?

I guess so.

And anyone else who’s birthday it might happen to be for that matter. Stop appologising for celebrating, Jesus. Every day marks the anniversary of some ugly event or other, this day is no more sad than any other. Every single second that goes by marks the deaths of multiple humans, needlessley, because of greed, and idiocy, and the general curse of humanity.

Boom boom!

My left eyeball is a useless sack of blood and my right is pained from straining all day. Zef taught me Flash and I animated me and Jeres having a fight, it was pretty ill. The video is not finished yet, but it will be. I may have to postpone coming to London till Sunday, which means I will miss seeing my friend Souraya. Whose birthday it is. Happy birthday Souraya!

Anyway, I am exhausted from all this Flash and my eyeball strain. So I shall off. I reviewed the Goldie Lookin Chain album for PlayLouder today, if you’re stuck for stuff to read.