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WATCH: Carnivale Season 2 Trailer

I am absolutely smitten by this show, as I mentioned on the Doncast.

IT IS SO FLIPPING GOOD IT MAKES ME WANT TO BOMB HBO’S OFFICES.

Because they cancelled it.

I have eight episodes left to watch. I might, like, not watch them, so I have something to look forward to.

COTDAMN.

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WATCH: Dangerous Minds’ Interview With Charles Johnson Part II

This guy has amazing eyebrows.

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BEHOLD: Aleister Crowley Action Figure!

All that Gaga wants for Christmas…

Via Megomuseum

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WATCH: Mr T – Treat Your Mother Right

Mother
There is no other
Like Mother
So treat Her right
Mother
I always Love Her
My Mother
So treat Her right

True talk. Pay attention fools!

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BEHOLD: Child Flees In Terror From Shitting Bird

Via all-that-glitters-is-gold

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LISTEN: Dicey Demeana – Slippin’

Describing himself as ‘Hip Hoppish spiritual and a visionary’, Dicey Demeana is a rapper based and raised in Southgate, North London; a fairly ordinary, middle class area, that was also the birthplace of Amy Winehouse. From the age of 16, after believing his lyrics were far better than those around him, but recognising he had much to improve on before he could be compared to his favourate rappers, Dicey went into hibernation and dedicated his time to perfecting every aspect of his game. Building up more and more of a passion for rapping the better he got, Dicey soon became obsessed with perfection, and refused to be showcased until he was comparable to the greats; convinced he had that potential. Four years later, aged 20 and no longer writing his raps down on paper (arrogantly proclaiming ‘if Jay-Z and Biggie can, I can’), Dicey claims to be realising that potential; rapping about everything and anything (literally).

When I came into this game it was my intention to be HONEST. To be RAW. To truthfully express the actuallity of my life.

I did pretty well, I think.

But what I did was NOTHING compared to what this man has done.

This man has crossed a line.

WOW.

SO HARSH.

It’s mother’s day on Sunday as well. Bet he hates Mother’s Day. Shee-it!

Props to Dark Man X who alerted me. If props are appropriate.

IESU GRIST!

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SITE OF THE DAY: Lazertits!

PYEEWM!

PYEEWM!

PYEEWM PYEEW PYEEWM!

YES!

It’s like Babies With Lazer Eyes, but with TITS instead of babies! LAZERTITS! AMAZING! Or should I say, A-LAZE-ING! PYEEWM!

Props to Matt Muir.

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Man Stabs Self To Death In Groin With Giant Pencil

Pretty much the weirdest thing you’ll read all day. From Ye Ole Morror:

A window cleaner died after stabbing himself in the groin repeatedly with a jumbo souvenir pencil, an inquest heard.

Jeffrey Burton’s family and friends were baffled by his bizarre death, which was recorded as an open verdict because there was no evidence he was trying to commit suicide.

Mr Burton, 57, was found by police in a blood-soaked room in his house in St Leonards, East Sussex, on September 27.

Worried neighbours raised the alarm after they were unable to get hold of him.

When police broke into his house they found Mr Burton lying on his back, wearing only his underpants.

The room was splattered with blood and music was still playing on his stereo. The giant blood-covered pencil was beside him.

He had a deep gash in his upper thigh.

East Sussex coroner Alan Craze told the Hastings inquest: “It’s a mystery to me. If you were choosing to take your own life, that’s not the way you would do it.

“It seems to me that it can’t have been a single stab wound. He seems to have worked on it. The pencil was blunt.”

Mr Burton’s sister Patricia Goodell told the hearing the pencil had sentimental value to her brother as it once belonged to their late mother. The inquest heard Mr Burton had suffered a single psychotic episode in 2006 but when he died he was sociable and healthy and looking forward to a holiday. He had never tried to commit suicide before and did not leave a note.

Mr Craze said: “It doesn’t stack up. Something very strange has gone on. We will never know what has caused him to create this awful wound.”

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WATCH: Lady Gaga ft Beyonce – Telephone

Wild At Heart X Death Proof / Hanna Barbera. Pretty much. This is flipping hilarious. Especially the over-blatant product placement. I was literally LOLing. Quietly, cos the missus is alseep.

GiAnT in ambition, natch. I dig that. I really really do.

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BEHOLD: Jamie Smart’s Talking To Dad

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