I do understand that a large proportion of you have never watched Smallville, the cheap American teen-show about the young Clark Kent, that’s been running on the CW for ten years. Why would you? It has a terrible reputation. I watched an episode of it once, one hungover teenage Sunday afternoon in Birmingham, and to be honest I rather enjoyed it, in a hungover Sunday afternoon sort of a fashion. Then I didn’t think about it again until a year or so ago, when my girl got into 4OD and started sneakily watching it while was doing things like the washing up.

One day I snuck in on her and caught the end of an episode. I think Green Arrow was killing Lex Luthor or something. I was pretty much instantly hooked. It is trashy, campy, ridonculous disposable fluff, with some deeply questionable scripting and acting. It has a negligible special effects budget, and its main character has less charisma than your average stick. But the supporting cast is mainly brilliant, and the people behind the show evidently love every part of it. Smallville has heart… and I really really enjoy it. In the increasingly rare occasions that I sit down in front of some streamed television, it whisks me away to a strange and magical world – a stupid, nonsensical world aimed at teenagers and populated by half-remembered comic characters from my youth. If Clark Kent doesn’t put on tights and start flying for another year I’ll still watch it, because I am a massive sucker and goonish romantic. Ale jaca est.

Anyway, never mind that – we have a WINNER to announce! The winner of yesterday’s feverishly popular caption contest! There were a lot of entries! Charlotte and BJ were on the phone for half an hour earlier deliberating.  And they have reached their decision. Drum roll please…

AND THE WINNER IS!

Thassright! The first cut was the deepest! Who’d a thunk it! Not that what followed wasn’t fantastic. Some of it was. That last entry from Charlie  (” AAAAHHHHH OOOOOOOOHHHH!!! Werewolves of london!!!”) nearly got it, but it had missed the ten pm deadline and it wouldn’t have been fair. Other close runners up included “U LOST THE GAME”, “I am a living sickness”, “Sheeeeeaaaaaaat!” and “I’m your blind date!”

A special mention also goes to, “i done a poo. in your house. but i’m not going to tell you where…” which caused me to nearly lose a rib, but Joey can’t possibly win as he legally counts as an employee. I shall expect something along the lines of, “but employees get paid!” in the comments. Use a fake name next time moanypants!

Yes, there were many ace entries. But there can be only one winner. And his name is Matt. MATT! Email me your address! You won this:

Whoo! Handmade ATD20 CD! The only one in existence! SPECIAL!

But it won’t just be Mark getting ace blue things in the mail this week. NO SIR! The Security Ts came in! And I spent all afternoon and all evening and all night packaging them (see small sample from around 9pm below), and I shall be dragging them to the post office tomorrow. So if you’ve been waiting to order yours, now’s the time!

OK. Coming up this week: More focusing on ATD20! The Comic finally gets a title and someone wins that drawing! And the All New Weekly Doncast returns on Wednesday at 5pm GMT! Let me know what you’d like to happen! I am open to suggestion!

Oh, and go see the gang at Sun On The Sand – they’ve got Only Happy When It Snows from ATD20 as a separate listening experience.

ALSO!

The second mixtape of the year!

Night!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

• WATCH: Rick Ross feat. Ne-Yo – Super High
• Me Drawing My Death’s Head Comic Strip Really Fast
• The All New Weekly Doncast # 5!
• How To Make A Kazoo
• And The Winner Is…
• EVERYTHING MUST STREAM

Tags: akira the don, caption contest, comic, dammit, drumroll, fly, mark, packing, reaction, sallville, strip, t-shirts, tights, typical reaction to an episode of smallville, winner